charles porter's blog

19 Nov

Hospital Stays

Unlike checking into the hotel, checking into the hospital has always given me that feeling of oh shit... Though the staff is nice and the docs are great you just know that there will be times when you are just about to get to sleep and someone comes in on you to check your vitals. Then there is the testing and the waiting and the unknown. This is a time to be like the river and just flow with whatever happens. Whatever news we get there is a solution and we just fight through. So here i am laying in my hospital bed and just going with the flow.

18 Nov

Pain Pain Go Away

Hello All... Im enjoying the night before I go into the hospital. I will be there for three days receiving what they call salvage chemo. its a strong treatment and Im looking forward to the results. I can't express enough how excited I am to be of this cancer. At times its feels like there is nothing wrong and then other times I can feel where the tumors are. This pain I look forward to not having soon. This is just one of the little reminders that I am sick and mind over matter really comes into play at this point because you try to block out the pain.

17 Nov

Accepting and Moving Forward

Hello friends... So I've been given my shipping orders and now i know what I will be doing in the next few days. It starts with a chemo treatment that is going to be strong and heavy. So once I go through two cycles of the treatment then we move on to a bone marrow transplant. This sounds scary and it is a little intimidating but it is something that this hospital does quite frequently so that eases some of the anxiety. The main thing is that I am not doing this alone and I know that others are going through this and worse as I speak. The fact is that this is life and life is real.

15 Nov

As Far as The Eye Can See

How much do we really know? I mean when we try to plan for the future and have this set up or that what are we really planning for? Of course you should have some type of outline and plan such as a retirement planning or savings for children's college but we don't really know what lays ahead. The twist and turns of fate that sometimes can not be prepared for and I don't think that one should go around preparing to get sick or for some tragedy to happen anyway. Bad Karma..hahaaa- But my point is that our vision is only as far as the eye can see.

13 Nov


What a day... Perfect weather, ocean views and great company. This was one of the best days in a long time. Take heed and take the time to hang with those that mean the most to you. And do some outdoor activities. Being with nature and hanging with loved ones takes the mind off of anything negative or scary and puts you right in the moment. As long as you live life to the fullest for as long as you can then there will be no regrets. Enjoy the moment and NEVER QUIT.

much love


12 Nov

BDAY Golfing

Its one of my best friend's birthdays tomorrow and we are going to play some golf to celebrate. What a way to bring in his new year.. Its gonna be a clear 80 degrees and we'll have some laughs. I was thinking tonight that the most important thing to do is to have as many laughs during these times as possible. The more you laugh the closer you are to healing. So smile, laugh, scream and shout... do whatever it takes to activate those endorphins. NEVER QUIT

much love


11 Nov

And so we Wait

All day yesterday and today was spent in the hospital. Much of the time I was waiting around. Waiting to hear if this scan or that scan was going to be able to done today. Finally they came to me and said that one would be done last night and the other today. When today came they said that the scan wouldn't be done until fri. This was very disheartening but last minute changes occurred and they got me in so it all worked out for the better. NOW WE WAIT. One major thing fighting this disease has taught me is patience.. Nothing comes when you want it but it usually there when you need it.

09 Nov

Staying Positive

I woke up this morning feeling good and as I got ready I just wanted to share that. I am heading to the hospital to get scanned to see if there is any progress or if there is a need to do another biopsy. My thoughts and prayers go out to those who are battling with any disease or struggle. Stay positive and NEVER QUIT.

much love


08 Nov

No one Said it Would be Easy

The fight continues and I found myself saying today that I just wanted to be finished with treatment. I just wanted to start the healing process. A friend then said.... No one said that it was going to be easy. It reminded me that its not easy and it wasn't supposed to be. We fight hard and we fight to the finish no matter what comes up.. Thats how you live like the river, right? We do what we can to make it through to the next day. So I muster up some strength and fight. Tomorrow I go into the hospital to get scanned again. MRI and PetScan. I pray for the best.. I will keep fighting..

07 Nov

Holiday Medicine

You know sometimes you just have to get away. I was under a large amount of anxiety the week of my test and then once I got the results, my girlfriend and I turned a work weekend into a little get away. Nothing cures like rest and relaxation but this trip was all about having fun. VEGAS baby. So my suggestion is to take the time to have fun and do it well. No regrets. Live life and put one step in front of the other and most importantly, NEVER QUIT.

much love